Saturday, July 22, 2006
The Lifesaving Station
Once again. Not original. This is attributed to Richard Whitecroft.
On a dangerous seacoast, where shipwrecks often occur, there was once a crude little lifesaving station. The building was just a hut, and there was only one boat, but the few devoted members kept a constant watch over the sea. With no thought for themselves, they went out day and night, tirelessly searching for the lost. Many lives were saved by this wonderful little station and it became quite famous.
Some of those who were saved, and various others in the surrounding area, wanted to become associated with the station and give of their time, money and efforts for the support of its work. New boats were bought and new crews trained. The little lifesaving station grew. Some of the members of the lifesaving station were unhappy that the building was so crude and poorly equipped. They felt that a more comfortable place should be provided as the first refuge of those saved from the sea. So they replaced the emergency cots with beds and put nicer furniture in the enlarged building. Soon, the lifesaving station was decorated beautifully and furnished exquisitely. Now the lifesaving station became a popular gathering place for its members and they used it as a sort of club.
As time passed, fewer and fewer members were interested in going to sea on lifesaving missions and they hired lifeboat crews to do this work. The lifesaving motif still prevailed in the club’s decor and there was even a liturgical lifeboat in the room where the club initiations were held.
About this time a large ship was wrecked off the coast and the hired crews brought in boatloads of cold, wet and half-drowned people. They were dirty and sick. Some of them had black skin and some had yellow skin. The beautiful new club was in chaos. So the property committee immediately had a shower house built outside the club where victims of a shipwreck could be cleaned up before coming inside.
At the next meeting, there was a split in the club membership. Most of the members wanted to stop the club’s lifesaving activities and viewed them as unpleasant and a hindrance to the normal social life of the club. Some members insisted upon lifesaving as their primary purpose and pointed out that they were still called a “lifesaving” station. But they were finally voted down and told that if they wanted to save the lives of all the various kinds of people who were shipwrecked in those waters, they could begin their own lifesaving station down the coast. They did.
As the years went by, the new station gradually experienced the same changes that had occurred in the old. It evolved into a club and yet another lifesaving station was founded. History continued to repeat itself and if you visit that seacoast today, you will find a number of exclusive clubs along that shore. Shipwrecks are still frequent in those waters, but most of the people drown.
On a dangerous seacoast, where shipwrecks often occur, there was once a crude little lifesaving station. The building was just a hut, and there was only one boat, but the few devoted members kept a constant watch over the sea. With no thought for themselves, they went out day and night, tirelessly searching for the lost. Many lives were saved by this wonderful little station and it became quite famous.
Some of those who were saved, and various others in the surrounding area, wanted to become associated with the station and give of their time, money and efforts for the support of its work. New boats were bought and new crews trained. The little lifesaving station grew. Some of the members of the lifesaving station were unhappy that the building was so crude and poorly equipped. They felt that a more comfortable place should be provided as the first refuge of those saved from the sea. So they replaced the emergency cots with beds and put nicer furniture in the enlarged building. Soon, the lifesaving station was decorated beautifully and furnished exquisitely. Now the lifesaving station became a popular gathering place for its members and they used it as a sort of club.
As time passed, fewer and fewer members were interested in going to sea on lifesaving missions and they hired lifeboat crews to do this work. The lifesaving motif still prevailed in the club’s decor and there was even a liturgical lifeboat in the room where the club initiations were held.
About this time a large ship was wrecked off the coast and the hired crews brought in boatloads of cold, wet and half-drowned people. They were dirty and sick. Some of them had black skin and some had yellow skin. The beautiful new club was in chaos. So the property committee immediately had a shower house built outside the club where victims of a shipwreck could be cleaned up before coming inside.
At the next meeting, there was a split in the club membership. Most of the members wanted to stop the club’s lifesaving activities and viewed them as unpleasant and a hindrance to the normal social life of the club. Some members insisted upon lifesaving as their primary purpose and pointed out that they were still called a “lifesaving” station. But they were finally voted down and told that if they wanted to save the lives of all the various kinds of people who were shipwrecked in those waters, they could begin their own lifesaving station down the coast. They did.
As the years went by, the new station gradually experienced the same changes that had occurred in the old. It evolved into a club and yet another lifesaving station was founded. History continued to repeat itself and if you visit that seacoast today, you will find a number of exclusive clubs along that shore. Shipwrecks are still frequent in those waters, but most of the people drown.
Friday, July 21, 2006
We need a new cuckoo clock.
I just got this on email. I guess I may have heard it before, but it bears retelling, especially since like I haven't posted in 7 weeks or so.
The Cuckoo Clock: Why ladies should avoid a girls night out after they are married!
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!"
Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNITE!)
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him "Midnight". He didn't seem peed off at all. Whew!! Got away with that one!
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."
When I asked him why?, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "Oh. s***.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted."
The Cuckoo Clock: Why ladies should avoid a girls night out after they are married!
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!"
Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNITE!)
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him "Midnight". He didn't seem peed off at all. Whew!! Got away with that one!
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."
When I asked him why?, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "Oh. s***.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted."
